There was a shift in my perspective/consciousness that can not be explained. There was an attempt to explain it in the last article.
Once you're in this perspective, there is no doubt about it. I have a intuitive knowing (not the intuitive knowing of how people think of it, a intuitive knowing/feeling/seeing, that has nothing else involved) that this perspective is the same for anybody who has ever truly 'experienced' what people call awakening, liberation, non-duality reality, enlightenment, etc... but every person uses different words/expressions to describe this same-thing (because it's really unexplainable). It is known to be the only true natural perspective of essence in everybody.
In order to explain it this time, I am going to use examples in a separate way, since that is the way most perceive things.
To separate this understanding, I am going use the term 'infinite conscious observer' as who you really are (from this awakened state) and human being as who most people think themselves to be. This is going to sound strange but bare with me because it might start to make sense by the end of this article.
The human being is a living organism that manages on it's own without a self being attached to it. The heart beats on it own, the human being breathes on its own, the five senses of the human being happen naturally on there own, words naturally arise, thoughts/emotions naturally occur. Who you really are as this 'infinite conscious observer', sees this quite clearly and doesn't involved itself with this natural process of the human being living out its life.
Somewhere along the line of this natural process of the human being just naturally living and the 'infinite conscious observer' naturally observing, they merge together (I will talk about how this happens later in this article).
Once this merging happens, the human being and the 'infinite conscious observer' become one (they were already one, but not in this sense) and from that moment forward the human being can't naturally live it's life without feeling like something is missing and the 'infinite conscious observer' can't reside in a place of naturally observing this creature (individual human being) without feeling like everything is separate. At the same-time, this human creature and this 'infinite conscious observer' thing both have a core understanding that something is not right.
Not knowing why they feel this way, they begin searching to fulfill this empty void. This searching comes in many different aspects, but usually it starts with trying to fulfill this empty feeling by chasing after lots of money, the perfect relationship, material things, etc... and later ends up in the searching for spiritual understanding. That's the most common way, but there are many different ways that this can be happen.
Before this merging happened, this human being creature and the 'infinite conscious observer' thing were connected only through the 5 senses, there was no understanding of a self involved. What this human creature felt was also felt by this 'infinite conscious observer' thing through the five senses, but there was an intuitive connection. What the 'infinite conscious observer' felt was also felt by the human being creature. The 'infinite conscious observer' intuitively knows that it is one with everything and through this knowing it was felt by this human being creature. It was a balance.
The Sense of Self
Once this merging takes place, an identity is formed and this is what we call self. It feels as if there is an identity with this human being body because instead of being in your natural place of observing, you are now occupying the body of this human creature as if it's yours. As a result, you feel as if you're trapped in this body and you know you don't naturally feel this way, since you intuitive know that you are infinite/boundless/complete and this human being creature feels like it now has control over what will happen in it's life instead of naturally living it's life out. This is a very confusing merging for both.
Layers of Connection/Oneness
This 'infinite conscious observer' seemed to naturally know that everything is one/connected through a direct connection of some energy source. This is what people call the God/Source or whatever label you prefer. Whatever is felt through the 5 senses of this human creature that is instantly passed onto this 'infinite conscious observer', this is also felt by this God/Source (in this way, every 'infinite conscious observer' that is connected to an individual body creature, is fully looped back to the God/Source).
However, this 'infinite conscious observer' doesn't question anything (which is instantly felt by the human being too, that's why once the merging collapses, the human being creature stops searching for meaning/purpose), it just stays observing this human creature (that it's connected to).
How the Merging Happens
As a child, we are born into this world with the 'infinite conscious observer' perspective. Somewhere around the age of two, this 'infinite conscious observer' and the human being creature got confused about their identity. Children only know it to be one way, from this perspective of the 'infinite conscious observer'. However, everyone around them is referring them as a body, as if that is who they are. It's very confusing for this new human being creature that we call a child and slowly this merging begins to take place out of this confusion.
Hence the saying: "the terrible twos". It's terrible for this child creature and it starts acting out since it starts forming an identity of self that was never there before. That merging and slowing becoming an identity of self feels out of place for the child creature, but it doesn't know any better. It assumes if all the creatures around it, see it this way, then it must be.
On the other side of this, the 'infinite conscious observer' slowly starts connecting with this new perspective because it's not a perspective that it has known before. Both innocently meet and start merging.
The Characters/Personality Story
Before the merge, the 'infinite conscious observer' was the only perspective you had. From this perspective, the 'infinite conscious observer' is observing the human being creature (while attached to only the 5 senses), much like watching a character/personality with a life story on movie screen, except in this movie instead of a screen you get to be aware of what the main character is seeing, hearing, smelling, tasting, feeling, thinking, experiencing.
However, you never for a moment think that you are this character and this character creature never for a moment thinks that it's experience is happening to a self. Both realize that it's just a story and there is no self or person inside that body, so the experience of it for both of you is like a fun adventure/game.
There is sadness, physical pain, anger, happiness, etc... but both realize that it's just part of the experience. Those things happen in life/the game and it's seen that it's just what happens. Those sensations naturally arise and naturally dissolve, it's all acceptable. Of course, you desire for your character to feel wonderful all the time, but if other things arise, then it's perfectly acceptable that it does since those things are programmed within this life/game.
Natural Emotions Verse Unnatural Emotions
However, from this 'infinite conscious observer' perspective, the character (and you) does not experience depression, jealousy, rage, panic, or separation because those are not natural emotions (judgment, blame, guilt, etc.. are also unnatural emotions). Those unnatural emotions are only experienced after the merge, when there is a sense of self. The natural emotions are sadness, envy, anger, fear, and love.
The reason those unnatural emotions are experienced is because almost everyone on this planet is living in an unnatural merge perspective and those emotions are seen as something 'bad' from this merging perspective, so while growing up we were all told to not feel those emotions. Those emotions were then bottled up and hence unnatural emotions developed.
Children can be told not to feel emotions on many levels that the parent is not usually aware of, like: "there, there, do not cry" is telling the child that there is something wrong or bad about crying and not to do it. From the 'infinite conscious observer' perspective, the human creature would intuitively know what to say and what to do in situations like that, just like from that perspective (the 'infinite conscious observer' perspective) you intuitively know that everything is connected.
Death
The only fear that is felt (by your character and hence you) is the natural fear of the body being in danger. This is programmed within the life/game so that the game can keep going. However, the character doesn't fear death because it intuitively knows that if the body dies, then it will only be what it always was: oneness (except without a creature body form). At the moment of death to your character, the 'infinite conscious observer' part of you would naturally merge with the energy of you as the God/Source (which is where it has always been).
Living in the Moment
From your 'infinite conscious observer' perspective, the character lives its life fully engaged in the moment and you simply observe it doing so. It fully puts all of its attention onto the present moment. Thoughts of past and future do occur in this human creature, but only as a moment thing and it's never a sense of urgency. Extreme thoughts of hanging onto the past or dramatic thoughts of the future only occur in the merged perspective.
It's comparable to playing a game, of course you want to reach the result of building the characters strength levels and eventually win the game, but you realize you can only do that by focusing on what you do with the character in the moment.
Except in this game of life you never directly interfere with the characters life. You (as the 'infinite conscious observer') may get a intuitively knowing of something out of nowhere and the instant you have that knowing it's passed onto the character (the human creature), but it's not ever a full knowing of why this intuitive knowing comes or what it means, you never question it and hence the human creature doesn't question it (this instant intuitive knowing is a direct feed from the God/Source and how it wants to play the game).
The Creative Flow
Also known as "being in the flow" this is a state that happens when a person is creating something and in that creation it seems to take on a life of its own. This can be anything from creating a piece of art, creating music, being fully engaged into a sport, or anything creative at all.
For me, it happens every now and again while writing an article. I never know for sure where the article will go, how the words are formed as I type. In fact, I don't even think about the words, I just keep my fingers moving and that's what comes out. There are no thoughts about it (or anything else in my life, I am totally focused on the now when this happens). I never questioned it because my best articles were created from this state.
The articles I write were always written while there was no self attached to this body, I was simply observing this human creature called Nicholas writing the article from the 'infinite conscious observer' perspective. In a sense neither one of us (the human creature or the 'infinite conscious observer') were writing articles because there was no self attached to either one. Everything was happening quite naturally.
So who wrote the article? Nobody (I wouldn't say noThing though, just noBody/noSelf), nobody seems to be doing anything except observe (at least from the 'infinite conscious observer' perspective). It's only a miss understanding in perspective that anything really does happen. Nobody really seems to do the doing, it just naturally occurs.
If I was having the perspective of self, the self would seem to be the one that wrote the article. From the perspective of the 'infinite conscious observer' the creature called Nicholas seemed to write the article and sense from the perspective of the 'infinite conscious observer' it's intuitively known that everything is connected as one and that intuitive knowing seems to come from an energy source that I label the God/Source, that energy source is really the only thing doing anything at all.
If you would like to hear this same-thing being explained from different 'people' who wake to this thing called awakening/ liberation/ non-duality reality/ enlightenment/ etc... check out my youtube account: http://www.youtube.com/user/nicholaspowiull and click on the videos in the favorite section (I will continue to add more and more videos, so you may want to subscribe or add me as a friend).
How Does This Apply to the Law of Attraction?
I received a readers question saying: "What you wrote resonates with me profoundly but I have seen the law of attraction work in my life over and over again so there has to be connection from this to that somehow right?"
Who you really are, is this 'infinite conscious observer' and from this observing state you possess the exact same energy as the God/Source. This energy is infinite and has the power to create anything it sees fit. Through this energy, you have that power. When the merging happens, you still are this energy and through the human creature you can than create.
The human creature doesn't care about creating (it's like program in a game, there is nobody inside that empty shell to care, it's just running on a program) and when you are in your natural observing state, you will not care either because you naturally see that you don't have control, only the God/Source is in charge, you realize this and you let It play the game how It sees fit (through the intuitive knowings you receive from this energy and that is passed onto your game character).
However, 'awakening' is something that just happens, you can't do anything about that because again the God/Source is the only thing in control, so while you think yourself as a self, you might as well create the reality you desire. You have that power through that energy and this God/Source energy allows it. As a result while you're stuck in this body, then sure, use all the tools available to you in order to ease the suffering of feeling stuck and not whole.
Posted by: Nicholas Powiull
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