Why do we humans procrastinate? People may think that procrastination in sense is someone being lazy. At first glance, that might seem to be the case, but what is really going on behind the scenes? What causes a person to put something off they should or want to be doing? What are the causes within you?
These are the questions to ask you before getting upset with yourself for procrastinating. If you know why you do not do those things you think you should, then you would understand how to change it. The only way to understand it is to look within and ask yourself honestly, "Why am I stopping yourself?".
Step One: Identify Why
We are all unique individuals so the answers will vary from case to case, but we are alike too and in that likeness there lays a worldwide answer to why people procrastinate. The answer is all kinds of fear, but almost every fear can be a root cause of PAIN.
The reason why we demobilize ourselves and sabotage is because we fear acting will result in more pain then not acting. We have belief systems that limit us from seeing the real result. Those limited beliefs form around avoiding the fear of pain. Therefore, the main question to ask is; “What pain am I avoiding by not doing this?” Perhaps you are not looking for a job because it is more painful to going through the interviews then to put it off. Perhaps you are not starting the business you always wanted to because you fear the pain of failing and that fear is stronger then taking action. Perhaps you do not start that relationship because the fear of rejection is stronger then taking action. Perhaps you do not express yourself fully to your loved ones because you fear the pain of judgment by those closest to you. Perhaps you do not clean your house because it much more pain to clean then to relax. Whatever the pain related issue once you get your answer then you know the reason why and give yourself the opportunity to change it, which is the first step.
Step Two: Condition Yourself
Has there been a point where you had to do the very thing you were avoiding because it would result in more pain putting it off, then to take action and get it done? For example, you felt you must go get a job or you are going to lose everything, you have to pay your bills. Therefore, you force yourself to take action and you wish you had taken action sooner.
Perhaps you must tell the person how you feel about them because this person is moving and the pain of living with these feelings never expressing is more painful then the rejection now that they are moving. Perhaps you force yourself to clean your house because it is in a condition that is not livable anymore and you have guests coming over.
So eventually through a series of events everything you are putting off will show its ugly head repeatedly until you do something about it. You might as well do it and get it over with before you force yourself to take action! The way to do that is to condition yourself to see more pros then cons of pain in whatever it is that you are procrastinating because whatever pain it is that you fear, you will eventually experience it through a series of events.
The easiest way to condition yourself is to write it down. Get a piece of paper out and write or type the pros/ cons and you will see through your list when you are done, that there are more pros then cons if you are honest about it. If there are not more pros then cons, carefully go through each con and ask yourself genuinely if that con is real for you? In other words, does that con really simulate fear of pain for you? The only reason you are not doing something you want to and know you need to is because the fear of pain in it. Is each and every con a real fear of pain for you?
You could easily say yes to all them without much thought, but if that is the case then ask yourself why. Why does this stimulate fear within me, what about this con is fearful to the point that I make it real? Slowly one by one the cons you write (once questioned) will not be as real as you first thought, meaning they are not fearful, and hold no power over you. Now you see more pros then cons and it is easy to take action once you see all the pros you will be getting after accomplishing.
Step Three: Making Lasting Change
Redefine the way you think of procrastination. Some people continuously procrastinate throughout their lives, they feel the pain of the procrastination so much that they accept it as who they are, and therefore take away all power to change it. They label themselves saying, “I am a procrastinator and I have to live with that”. In doing this they stop feeling the pain as much because when they procrastinate, at least they could expect it and not be disappointed with themselves. At least they can be certain that they will not take action and therefore feel better about it. Perhaps one of the worse decisions to make is that of labeling yourself. If you want lasting change, you must see procrastinating as a choice not a disorder.
Procrastination is a big word and even the sound to hear it for most people brings up a lot of pain and starts stimulating responds of negativity within the body, causing toxicants of stress to be produced. Just hearing or reading the word ‘procrastination’ can do that because it forces you to think of the things you are putting off, even sometimes without conscious thought. Being forced to be aware of all the things you are putting off can cause stress and it is a proven fact that stress breaks down the immune system, causing toxic chemicals to be released within the body. So redefine procrastination as an opportunity to take action, not something you need, must or have to do, but an opportunity to make your life better and to become a better person by doing so. Besides that most of everything you feel you NEED to do, is not a need at all. It is only a choice in order to stay comfortable where you are at in the given moment. The moment you stop thinking of it as something you have to do then you just do it. When you HAVE to, it makes all the difference in the world when you realize you do not HAVE to, it is only a choice and a choice that is easier to make now that you see it as a choice.
These are the questions to ask you before getting upset with yourself for procrastinating. If you know why you do not do those things you think you should, then you would understand how to change it. The only way to understand it is to look within and ask yourself honestly, "Why am I stopping yourself?".
Step One: Identify Why
We are all unique individuals so the answers will vary from case to case, but we are alike too and in that likeness there lays a worldwide answer to why people procrastinate. The answer is all kinds of fear, but almost every fear can be a root cause of PAIN.
The reason why we demobilize ourselves and sabotage is because we fear acting will result in more pain then not acting. We have belief systems that limit us from seeing the real result. Those limited beliefs form around avoiding the fear of pain. Therefore, the main question to ask is; “What pain am I avoiding by not doing this?” Perhaps you are not looking for a job because it is more painful to going through the interviews then to put it off. Perhaps you are not starting the business you always wanted to because you fear the pain of failing and that fear is stronger then taking action. Perhaps you do not start that relationship because the fear of rejection is stronger then taking action. Perhaps you do not express yourself fully to your loved ones because you fear the pain of judgment by those closest to you. Perhaps you do not clean your house because it much more pain to clean then to relax. Whatever the pain related issue once you get your answer then you know the reason why and give yourself the opportunity to change it, which is the first step.
Step Two: Condition Yourself
Has there been a point where you had to do the very thing you were avoiding because it would result in more pain putting it off, then to take action and get it done? For example, you felt you must go get a job or you are going to lose everything, you have to pay your bills. Therefore, you force yourself to take action and you wish you had taken action sooner.
Perhaps you must tell the person how you feel about them because this person is moving and the pain of living with these feelings never expressing is more painful then the rejection now that they are moving. Perhaps you force yourself to clean your house because it is in a condition that is not livable anymore and you have guests coming over.
So eventually through a series of events everything you are putting off will show its ugly head repeatedly until you do something about it. You might as well do it and get it over with before you force yourself to take action! The way to do that is to condition yourself to see more pros then cons of pain in whatever it is that you are procrastinating because whatever pain it is that you fear, you will eventually experience it through a series of events.
The easiest way to condition yourself is to write it down. Get a piece of paper out and write or type the pros/ cons and you will see through your list when you are done, that there are more pros then cons if you are honest about it. If there are not more pros then cons, carefully go through each con and ask yourself genuinely if that con is real for you? In other words, does that con really simulate fear of pain for you? The only reason you are not doing something you want to and know you need to is because the fear of pain in it. Is each and every con a real fear of pain for you?
You could easily say yes to all them without much thought, but if that is the case then ask yourself why. Why does this stimulate fear within me, what about this con is fearful to the point that I make it real? Slowly one by one the cons you write (once questioned) will not be as real as you first thought, meaning they are not fearful, and hold no power over you. Now you see more pros then cons and it is easy to take action once you see all the pros you will be getting after accomplishing.
Step Three: Making Lasting Change
Redefine the way you think of procrastination. Some people continuously procrastinate throughout their lives, they feel the pain of the procrastination so much that they accept it as who they are, and therefore take away all power to change it. They label themselves saying, “I am a procrastinator and I have to live with that”. In doing this they stop feeling the pain as much because when they procrastinate, at least they could expect it and not be disappointed with themselves. At least they can be certain that they will not take action and therefore feel better about it. Perhaps one of the worse decisions to make is that of labeling yourself. If you want lasting change, you must see procrastinating as a choice not a disorder.
Procrastination is a big word and even the sound to hear it for most people brings up a lot of pain and starts stimulating responds of negativity within the body, causing toxicants of stress to be produced. Just hearing or reading the word ‘procrastination’ can do that because it forces you to think of the things you are putting off, even sometimes without conscious thought. Being forced to be aware of all the things you are putting off can cause stress and it is a proven fact that stress breaks down the immune system, causing toxic chemicals to be released within the body. So redefine procrastination as an opportunity to take action, not something you need, must or have to do, but an opportunity to make your life better and to become a better person by doing so. Besides that most of everything you feel you NEED to do, is not a need at all. It is only a choice in order to stay comfortable where you are at in the given moment. The moment you stop thinking of it as something you have to do then you just do it. When you HAVE to, it makes all the difference in the world when you realize you do not HAVE to, it is only a choice and a choice that is easier to make now that you see it as a choice.
